Tomorrow is the day when all of us need to get together and jump. Each year on the 20th of July we try to disrupt the earth. I know so far we haven't been successful but that is because we aren't trying hard enough. I reckon that if we "all" get it right we will be able to due amazing things. My predictions for problems averted by "the jump" are as follows.
1. Peace in the middle east
I'm not really sure how; but there is a good chance that Israel and the ME will place down their weapons if we can work this out. They will (possibly) believe divine intervention.
My prediction is that when we jump the ozone will allow all of the CO2 in the upper atmosphere to escape via an opening, then upon landing it will close up and it will appear as if pollution never existed. In a few years people will sit back and say, "Wow, who would have thunk it?".
3. I will become a millionaire
This one is very simple. By the amount of hits/click-throughs I get from this blog I will become a millionaire via the Goggle ads. My plan is fool proof.
I know all of you out there don't believe me but there is only one way to find out. I mean come on, how much fun will it be to stand up in unison and jump. You will be able to right that time off when you file your taxes. It will go down under the voluteer section, IANAA but "World Jump Day" has to count. The problem will be calculating out the exact price of the jump. Hey there's an idea, what a way to stick it to the man. Practice jumping and claim that back to. The money will start rolling in.
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